I Will Always Love You 私は常に愛する

2010年11月30日星期二

Pressure + Time = DOOM!

Pressure and time.
Once again, they are so not my friendly friend at all.

Am rushing socio's journal assignment like hell.
Then there's PR presentation, where i still got a weird feeling.

Nothing so far is done properly or the way that make me feel comfortable and can relax for a while. (That's the reason i'm here. Now.)
It's just like Sem2 is so not my semester at all.
Everything was a mess.
I keep blaming and hurting myself literally.
I was lost once.

And now.
Am supposed to be studying for finals now.
But i'm still rushing assignments.

I'm giving myself pressure.
My brain will stop function for a while in the most crucial moments.
I cant form a sentence when i'm making decisions.
I'm a bit emotional when i'm dealing with people.
I can blanked for a second while people are talking to me.

Argh~
Why cant the both of them be my friend?
Or at least mercy me for this moment of time.
I want to get things done on time...
*
I know i should make my decision.
And i should stay strong with it.

When time goes by, pressure blocking my eyeview, i forgot that decision.
Until Omma reminds me, and i was a bit shocked.
The reason was simply because, how on the earth i have forgetten?

I've been keep saying it when the idea came to my mind.
People surrounding me support it.
Some even volunteer to help out.
But in the end, i forgot!
And i couldnt give an answer to it.

What's wrong with me?
I keep delay it and until i couldnt persuade myself anymore.

Maybe i need to layback and think deeply again.

What is the best for me and what's not?

What should i give up?

Can i be more happy?

Can i be more satisfied?

Questions once again...
*
Less than 2 months and he'll back.
I know i should feel happy.
But the pressure and time wont allow me.
Still, i always manage to find space and happy for a while.
Haha~

Weather getting colder and colder there.
Heard from radio, tomorrow will be only 17 degrees.
I was like, "WHAT?! Just froze me in a freezer and dont unlock it for 138712 years."
Haha~ i know it's bit exaggerate.

Dear, remember to wear more clothes.
And dont forget to rest more.
Be careful not to catch cold.

I miss you =)

2010年11月28日星期日

忙忙忙

厚~
现在才开始赶功课。
真的不应该。
>.<

Sem2真的令人感到很懒惰叻~
不要问我为什么。
就是开始提不起劲。
凡事都会想慢慢来，反正时间多得很。

结果，造就了现在要赶功课的状态。
真的太不应该了。

真不明白为何当初会有那些想法。
这一切当然要怪自己了哦~
又不是别人的错。

现在也还没开始温习功课呢~
要是Sem1，现在已经开始温习了。
也开始找历年考卷来做了。
可是现在？
却才开始赶功课。
厚~
有点不能原谅。

李依琳啊~醒来咯~
要赶功课了！！！
*
昨天接到表姐的电话。
问我几时可以开始开工。
我当然答16/12咯~
15号在考着最后一张，要我怎样去哦~

挂了电话，才恍然大悟，其实这通电话应该是我打才对。
我应该问到底有没有工作让我做。
为何却是反过来呢？

我不敢说是自己有责任感，不怕苦。
毕竟这是每个人该有的态度的性格。
而且，还有人比我更厉害呢~

但我也多多少少知道公司现在的状况。
所以才比较会需要有经验的人来帮手。
而我就刚刚好又住附近，又比较不需烦交通。
再说我也蛮熟悉公司的运作和速度。
所以才会第一时间想到我吧~

怎样都好，还是很感激那通电话。

让我比较不必烦假期时该做什么。

虽然时间比较短暂，但只要有时间能赚钱，何不接受呢~

再说，回到熟悉的环境工作，很快就能安定自己的心情。

看来这假期又会很忙咯~
>.<
*
最近都忙着功课，有点忽略了他。
唉~
能怪谁？
还不是我自己。
自己拿来的。

只能在这边说声，对不起，最近都会忙功课，过后还有考试要忙。
考完试后，就开工了。
都好像没留什么时间给他。
有点内疚叻~
@@

亲爱的，真的很对不起哦~
年尾好像很忙哦~
没办法啦~
你也应该知道为何我会这么忙得理由。
尤其赚钱的动机。
如果我真的忽略到你，也请你原谅我。
我会好好照顾我自己的。
不要担心我。
你在那边也是要好好照顾自己。

我好想你哦~

2010年11月26日星期五

So Broke =(

Less than three weeks, and will be facing finals.

Woa~

Times sure flies.

After finals, Sem2 has officially end.

Start prepare for Sem3.

Which means, 3 more sems to go before graduate.

It's just a bit surprised.

I mean just half a year ago, i was still a girl, searching for the answer to get my future done.

I was still wandering around, dont know what to do.

But know, after 7 months, i'm a college student.

Studying Diploma in Mass Comm at IACT college.

Isnt it amazing or not?

Shall i thanks fate or myself for making the choice.

Though there were times i think twice, still they were the one that make me strong.

There were too problems, i got no choice but to solve it or move on.

3 more semesters, and i will be stepping in society.

To a world which famously known as a dangerous place and need skills and luck to survive.

Peek through that world, and i still dont know if i can handle it or not.

Well, for now, i just gotta focus on my finals.

The rest, just leave it for future to uncover it...

Oh dear, i am realy so damn broke.

Not much money left in my wallet.

Every morning wake up with "what should i eat for lunch? Cheap and full."

Haiz.

Cant blame me.

Went to 2 trips in one month.

You can imagine how much i've spent there.

Why cant i live through the entire month without thinking about all these?

I mean, i've tried to work hard to earn more money.

I dont want to be a burden to my parents.

Raising three kids, with one in college, two in the line.

It just seems unfair to not share the burden.

To be honest, my motive to earn money, is not to be a burden to my parents.

I want them to not feel unhappy with it.

Damn it.

I really hate it whenever my parents asked if i had enough money.

And sometimes when i really cant survive, i just gotta answer truthfully.

And then guilt will pour all over my body.

As if all these actions were unfilial.

Can i at least stop having this time of feeling?

Or maybe i should be more smart and get my Diploma done and get a job immediately?

Or just screw me...

2010年11月24日星期三

又是压力。。。

今天早上，大概5点吧，就醒着躺在床上了。
为什么？

唉~
都是被吓醒的。
突然就是在梦中想到还有未完成的功课。
而且下个星期就要交了。
可是到现在还是还没见到结尾。

应该又是压力在作怪。
再加上本身就不是很喜欢最后一分钟功夫，担心就难免会产生。

从5点就一直躺到7点闹钟响。
从床上起身，带有点匆忙的脚步准备上学。
可是脑中还是一直盘旋那些未完成的功课和报告呈现。

唉~
希望到时什么事情都能顺利完成。
也祈祷坏脾气和不耐心不要在这个时候跟我作对。
我真的很需要时间和耐性来完成了。
*
那天，很随心地，突然想一整天都听王力宏的歌曲。
所以，一开电脑，第一件事就是上youtube，播放王力宏的歌曲。

从刚出道，到近期的作品，都慢慢的细听了。
只能说，果然是我欣赏且喜欢成狂的偶像。

那么多首歌曲，还是《Forever Love》和《安全感》是我的最爱。

因为《Forever Love》而开始投注我的爱；《安全感》可说是王力宏的代表作品，也是一直能在我脑中盘旋很久的旋律的一首歌曲。

呵呵~
果然是我的最爱。
王力宏，我会永远支持你的！
你除了要多点制作音乐来与世界分享，也别忘了要照顾自己的健康哦~
<3>
*
昨天他对朋友说，应该是我怕他跑掉。
呵呵~
是啊~
说真话，哪个女人会不怕，不担心呢~ 如果真的有，我还真想跟那女人学两招来。 >.<

后来想想，其实我差不多每天都在怕。
应该说，自从我们开始的那一天，我都有点担心。
毕竟我们不是常见面的。
要见面，都得等上差不多1个月。
每天就是靠电话sms来联络感情。

然后二月，他到台湾了。
很多人都说，台湾的女生都很猛。
尤其夜店kaki的。
甚至还开video给我看。
你说，我的心情会是什么？
但是我选择相信他，选择放手让这段感情更坚强。

现在还有一个月又一天，他会回来过新年。
心中有点小期待了。
甚至还有点小贪心，想与他度过每一天。
但现实和梦想都有差别。

无论如何，亲爱的，今天很想你哦~

2010年11月22日星期一

Another trip, Another memories

Yes! Am back from another trip to Port Dickson.
Haha~
Dont ask me why i had agree to go twice in a month.
But being with different group of people, brings different kind of excitement, different kind of entertainment, different kind of memories.
Best of all, you still enjoy every single moment.

Went with college mate this time.
And i drove too.
Well, it was kinda hard to get the car from Daddy.
(Gotta go through all the nagging and advise.)

Depart from Jaya One.
And we took Sepang route to reach there.
This time, we stay at "Glory Beach Resort".
But then, we stayed at their apartment.
Haha~

Oh ya~
And i gotta ride on Banana Boat this time.
Guess what?
We were flipped for 4 times!
4 times, man!
The guy told us we only get to flip 2 times.
But i guess he saw us so enjoy and we were screaming like hell.
So he treat us by giving us 2 more.
Gosh~
Still, thank you so much.

Well, all i could say, i really did enjoy my time with you guys.
Hope there's another trip.
(Please dont let me go twice to a place >.<)
DMC 201004, you guys definitely know how to rock my world!
<3
*
Came back to KL and i can feel stress is piling up.
Going to a trip, makes me temporarily forget all the problems that i'll be facing.
It always had been like this.

Got a phone call during the trip.
Came back and realized finals is coming.
Before that, final presentations and assignments need to meet the deadline.

I wish i had the strength and luck to get through.
Though there'll be time i might need to be emotional, just dont worry about me.
That's how i deal with stress.
And that's how i deal with myself too.

To grow up, it's to meet up with lots of stress.
Eventually, it'll make you grow stronger and thicker.

Come on girl, arent your dream is to become a strong woman?
Wake up and make your dream come true.
No more excuses and laziness.
Be strong and stay strong!
*
Of course i do miss him.
But still what can i do without his present?
I only can change channel, make those emotion become a strength to enjoy every moment.

Yes, i do admit.
Sometimes i might need someone to give me a cuddle or even just a smile.
But it was my friends asked me to hold on.
He'll back soon.
Just hold on and believe in this relationship.

Dear, i just miss you...

2010年11月18日星期四

天堂和地狱

一大早起床就换了新床单，心情当然也随着飞扬起来。
那个床单的颜色真的很美。
而且也带有点新气息的味道。
那感觉真的很美妙。

但，一打开电脑，发现自己没有Raw File Support Software时，心情跌到地狱了。
忍不住在Twitter上发泄，也得到朋友的安慰。

天啊~
星期五就要交功课了。
我到底来不来得及搞定好？
现在头一直在盘旋，有什么办法可以快速解决这问题？

唉~
Sem1时，我都很快就交功课了。
而且都是第一个交。
可是现在进入Sem2，整个人有点懒懒散了。
不再是第一个交了。
反而有点最后一分钟的在赶。

厚~
李依琳啊~
不要再找借口了。
懒惰永远都不可以拿来当借口的。
反而要想尽办法来打败它。
你不能再这样下去了。
会影响你日后的态度和责任感。
不要再这么下去了！
*
最近对食物的欲望又开始减低了。
这感觉好熟悉。
仿佛就像几年前，曾经一度不想吃东西。

我否认自己有什么毛病。
只是一想到那些食物的油质和卡路里，整个人就变得没有食欲了。
当然我不是在减肥还是什么的。
只是真的一想到那一方面，整个人就没有精神了。

不知是因为最近看多了这方面的资讯。
心里慢慢产生的疙瘩。
真的难以相信，那些食物在进我们口前，是“经历”这么多的工程。
一个阶段比一个阶段来得毒。

唉~
为什么我们会变成这样？
我有时甚至不想吃东西，就看着旁人，望梅止渴好了。
（偷偷说，有时甚至会“祝福”旁人。）
*
天啊~
他参观了花博。
拍到的照片，都天杀的好美哦~
真希望自己有机会能大开眼界。

呵呵~
但没关系啦~
自我安慰：有照片看，他很享受，已经不错了。
^^

他也买了一条自制手环。
还蛮特别的。
但真的希望像他这么说，价钱不会很贵。
学生嘛~要省点用。

亲爱的，好想你哦~

2010年11月16日星期二

Everything I Do, I Do It For You by Bryan Adams

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

look into eyes
you will see
what you mean to me
search your heart
search your soul
and when you find me there
you’ll search no more
don’t tell me
it’s not worth trying for
you can’t tell me
it’s not worth dying for
you know it’s true
everything i do
i do it for you
look into heart
you will find
there’s nothing there
to hide
take me as i am
take my life
i would give it all
i would sacrifice
don’t tell me
it’s not worth fighting for
i can’t help it
there’s nothing i want more
you know it’s true
everything i do
i do it for you
there’s no love
like your love
and no other
could give more love
there’s now here
unless you’re there
all the time
all the way
www.5ilrc.com 欢迎您
oh you can’t tell me
it’s not worth trying for
i can’t help it
there’s nothing i want more
i would fight for you
i’d lie for you
walk the wire for you
ya i’d die for you
you know it’s true
everything i do
i do it for you
*
Argh~
Friday is coming and i still havent come out an idea of what to shoot for photojournalism.
I'm so doom!

It's not like it never happen to me before, but i know the reason that keep pulling me away from getting ideas.
And i dont want mention it again.
I'll feel disappointed and angry.

But right now, what matters the most, I NEED AN IDEA!!!

Thought of shooting my mum as a working mum.
But then, my mum doesnt really fit in the profile of a working mum.
She's just working part time or just in her free time.
So i dont know whether the pictures will come out well or not.
Well, Buddha bless me now.

I really need an idea, some few pictures, and time to let me edit and print it out.
Please be nice to me.
I'm trying to get back what's more important to me right now.
>.<
*
Chatted a lot since the day i made that decision.
And a lot of stuff we talked about.
Not gonna reveal here.
Hehe~
So go figure yourself out.
Most of the topic surrounded of the time he's back.

Things get a little better now.
At least i'm trying to make things work.
No more disappointment nor worries.
That will be the last thing i ever want.

Dear, i miss you so much...

2010年11月14日星期日

我还只是个学生！

我忍不住了！
你给我的压力和无理，我真的无法承受了！
不是因为我懦弱，而是你曾经让我一度怀疑自己到底还是不是学生！

这个问题真的很严重了。
为了你，我觉得我学业开始滑落了。
我的开销也比上个月来的高。
最重要的是，我竟然为了你而掉眼泪！
这也令我有点傻眼！

我到底还是个学生。
并不是上班人士。
也不是专业人士。
你每天说我们是专业人士，也略懂一点东西。
是啊~
但请铭记在心底，我们还是学生！

是的，你花了一笔费用。
但说真的，以“专业”角度来看，我们给你的数目是远远比真正的专业人士来的便宜到不行了。
然而你一直提起这个问题。
要不是你是客户，而且还是个长辈，我早就告诉你这个问题了！

拜托拜托，我真的顶不顺了！

*
昨晚参加了同事的乔迁派对。
说真的，看到大家还真的有点开心。
可能是因为你们让我知道原来社会是这么多面的。
但只要懂得保持自己的原则和界限，还是可以很轻松地聚在一起。

昨晚也是我喝很多酒的一晚。
灌了自己3罐Carlsberg，一杯Jura，一口的Midori Melon和Midori Green Tea，一罐Heineken。
呵呵~
但放心啦~ 我只是轻微地醉，但还是能走直线，还是蛮清醒，只是有点想睡觉。

我也不知道为什么自己会喝那么多。
只记得，我看到Carlsberg，就伸手开了一罐，接下来就喝了这么多。

可能是难得可以远离自己的范围。
远离了那些压力。
和一群每天与压力对抗的社会人士，我自己又算什么。
也借此让自己不要去想。
所以就可能想借酒精来转移注意力。

而且当场的每一个人一直问我是否够岁喝了。
废话！
老娘我很小的时候，就被我老爸灌了。
13岁第一次和朋友喝。
哈哈~
但我每次都没醉，因为我知道自己的极限和技巧。

只能说，昨晚真的是我最轻松的一次。
但还是会少喝了。
因为伤身嘛~
而且也不要让人担心。
^^
*
还有两个月又十一天。
天啊~
我竟然在倒数日子。
哈哈~

我不知道我那时在与压力对抗时，我说了什么。
但我很清楚，我让他担心了。
这完全不是我很喜欢的事情。
但我还是做了。
而且也让他担心了。
尤其当时我的眼泪。

隔日的废话话题成功让我开心些。
心里虽然还是有点难过，至少已经没什么自责了。
现在下定决心要脱离“苦海”，还是有点因为他。

亲爱的，我好想你哦～

2010年11月12日星期五

Tears + Stress

Oh dear, i didnt know that stress had giving me a hard time.

Tears fall that day.
And i didnt realized until i feel something wet on my cheek.
And until i heard my voice sobbing over the phone.
I dont know it was my fault or not.

Tears had not been my favorite thing.
And it always the last thing i want to do with.
For me, tears had always represent weak, useless, nothing...
It just make me feel so small and unbelievable useless.

People always said, tears is woman's weapon.
Use it wisely to take control of one thing.
But i just couldnt help but feel a little powerless.

Stress and tears.
Definitely not a combination i loved the most.
And the very least thing i want to do.

I know i'm a newbies and i know things is a bit rush.
But the words that had been used and the attitude that had been shown, just makes me feel stress and wanna curse.
I always had to jungle my time around this and that.
And i'm not happy with it.

Please...
Just let me sleep soundly for just one night...
*
It always feel great to have a bunch of crazy friends.
Especially when you're down and things arent going smoothly.
You know just where they are and how surprise you'll be.

I didnt mean to post my tears, but it just happened.
Then the next thing i know, they start hugging you with their words.
You can feel their warmth through monitor.
You can accept their love with some kind of connection.

They just know what you want and what you're missing with.
They might not able to provide, but they tried.
And you know it's enough and satisfying.
Just the way they always did.

I really do miss them.
Every single one of them.
Even when things arent going smoothly and you dont wish to tell the world, you will still miss them.
How can i not be blessed?

Crazy people will always ended up with a bunch of crazy friends.
I just love every single one of them.
<3
*
Thanks to him too.
Was having hard and i made him worried.
Though he really tried to make me feel better, and yes i did.

You just cant imagine what he did or what he said.
It might sound funny or ridiculous to outsider.
But it just to making me happy and i love it.

Like i said, he always pick the right time to cure me, comfort me.
Heart felt warm and blessed.
As if he was an angel that brought to my life.

Dear, just wanna say thank you and sorry for making you worried.
But i'm ok now.
I miss you...

2010年11月10日星期三

烦烦烦！！！

我有时真的会怀疑自己到底是不是学生。
每天为了客户的事情而忙着，有时都忘了我的优先事务还是学业。

每天都被电话和e-mail缠着。
每天就是烦着要如何尽快把客户的事情搞定。
不要被客户烦着，也不要被客户影响。
真的很烦。

我真的不想多说。
但就是无法把这个想法关闭在我的心里。
因为真的太难以隐藏了。

每天就是为了客户而忙上忙下。
想起之前是为了学业，可是现在确实为了客户。
说起来，我还是没有工资的情况下。

唉~
客户，就请你高台贵手，我还真的只是个学生，就不要让我这么烦，好吗？
*
星期五就有个考试，而我还没开始温习。

唉~
还不是那个历史。
真的很讨人厌。
真的不知该怎样应付好。

讲师又没什么教到。
每天上课反而听的是讲师自己的历史。
从来都很少真正听他教课。
而且就算真的有教，声音又小小声，又爱拿比较，搞到整班都没心情听。

现在想到要考试了，好真的有点难收拾心情来应付考试。
怎么办啦？

但我又不想再让任何人失望了。
我现在真的很不想再看到失望的样子了。
尤其自己每天站在镜子前。

李依琳，要振作了！
不要再这样耍性子了！
*

“嘿，亲爱的。
你知道是你让我学会恋爱的吗？
那个永远只会过着自己生活的任性小孩，在见到伙伴后，决心停下脚步。
你让我发现，要相信一个人，其实比想象中简单。
等待并不恐怖，适当的沉默，往往是最好的空间。
我开始学会读取眼神里透露的语言，我学会放低姿态，我学会不顾一切的道歉。

嘿，亲爱的。
原来真的喜欢上一个人，是懂得尊重跟妥协，我们不会改变自己。但，我们在乎别人的看法，猜测对方的爱。
我当然很痛恨你的忙碌，厌恨你的务实，但当你看着我时，有时候微笑，有时候难过，有时候甜蜜。
我们是奇妙的同类。
有时拗执的坚持，从小什么都没有的我们，独孤排众议的想走自己想走的路，做自己想做的事。
只是，当我们渐渐长大后，会发现，事与愿违太容易了。
就算你的家人父母不在成为你的负担，远渡他乡去寻找新的机会。
可是，该有的伤害还是会在，那时我们只是想自闭地躲起来。

嘿，亲爱的。
我说的话都是真的，我不会去干涉你的烦恼，那些我不了解，也难以了解的烦恼，但我会支持你，然后，顾好我自己不让你操心。在跟你相恋的每一天里，慢慢地学会，去相信。”

---《恋爱是种邪教》贝利---

2010年11月8日星期一

Hurt + Happy

Is it that we have go through all this friendship problem in every semester?
I mean come on, do we really have to?

I'm not saying any names.
And please dont condemnation.
It's just i'm a little tired with all these problems.

I know we came from different background.
We might even have our own gang.
We might need time to understand each other.
We just need each other to get things done.

But then again, with all the stupid childish act, and someone hurting someone, i'm hurt too.
You guys were my closest buddies whenever i'm alone in an unfamiliar environment.
I approached to you guys because i just do.
And now, after 7 months together, conflict sure will happened.
Just please dont take things too serious.
This is how life meant to be.

I'm hurt too.
And sometimes i wish this would never happen in the next semester.
I'm just afraid of losing someone again.
And this friendship is too precious for me.
I just want us to be together and stay strong forever...

*
Argh~
I'm so damn broke this month!
Ya, it's only the second week of the month, and i'm declaring i'm broke.

Why?
Ok, i'll list out where i'll be in this whole month.

5/11 - PD trip with the gals. (DONE!)
13/11 - A talk in Taylor's Lakeside.
13/11(Night) - Colleague moved in new house and having open house party.
20~22/11 - PD trip again with college buddies.
25/11 - Melaka trip for photography class trip.

There.
My entire month plan.
And dont forget all the final presentation and final assignments' deadline are at the end of this month.
Money and time!
Great!
What a nice combination to torture me.

I really need to think deeply about that problem.
Look at my plan now, if it werent for that problem, i guess i should be happy now instead declaring myself broke.
Haiz~
Can i borrow some money and time?
*
Webcam with him yesterday.
Damn i miss him so much.
(Maybe it's the trip >.<)

He's having exam now and i dont dare to disturb him.
And he went to clubbing too.
Haha~ (Should i tell him my experience? =p)
Never mind, as long as he's safe and sound, i'm all happy and satisfied.

Think it's going to be winter time.
Hope he wears enough to keep warm.
Try to stay in bed to not get cold.
And get more rest.
Dont fall sick again.
>.<

Dear, i just miss you so much...

2010年11月6日星期六

回忆

4/11/2010
为了帮芊庆祝生日，我们都在facebook里讨论到底要怎样进行。
最后，大家都选了在Menjalara的“好好火锅店”。

其实都蛮简单的过程。
就只是说要带芊出来，可是不告诉她地点和出席人物。
我呢，就充当司机，接送了姐妹们。
而另一班男的就先早到地点，作好准备。
我这辆就迟点出发。

到了目的地，我们牵着芊到餐馆。
芊最初只是看到几位坐在座位上，有点惊喜。
可是重头戏在后面。

芊完全不知道Kim Kim会到场。
所以当Kim Kim从后面拿着蛋糕出现时，芊的脸上尽是惊喜和感动。
我们就知道计划成功了。

过后就开始吃火锅了。
我们这一班聚在一起，就好象无法收拾那样。
整间餐馆都是我们的声音而已。
哈哈~
但不理啦~
大家难得能聚在一起，未来的日子就有几位要道远方深造了。
为何不乘这个时间好好的给它聊个够。

大约9点多，因为隔日要到Port Dickson玩，所以我们就去Tesco买了些零嘴。
在Tesco里面我们也干了蛮多疯狂的事。

买好了，大家还嫌早，就跑到Desa Parkcity里。
那里有个大操场和游乐园。
我们就在游乐园里又在嘻嘻哈哈的。
到处都是我们的声音，到处都留下我们的影子。
仿佛隔日大家都会消失，或者很难预测我们是否还这机会。
总之我们超癫的。

逗留到大约11点多，我们就散了。

还是想对芊说，生日快乐！
希望你会喜欢我们带来的惊喜。
也很谢谢你一路来带来的欢喜。
我还蛮喜欢你的笑声，仿佛就是没什么烦恼。
和你在一起，我真的能放下心中疙瘩，很放松地与你相处。
芊，希望我们友谊长存。
<3
*
对了，上面就提到我们到Port Dickson去玩。
这次的旅程是在完全没有找宿舍，游玩的地点情况下出发的。

两天一夜的旅程，真的很难去诉说。
当中我们遇到了不讲理的人，我们环保了，我们玩了刺激游戏。。。
说是没有准备，可是我们还是玩得好疯癫。

果然这次的旅程虽然是因为缺乏资料，没有找地方玩到，但我还是很投入。
很喜欢与你们在一起的时光。
我可以很自在的呼吸。
可以很自在地做我自己。
可以很自在地谈天说地。

虽然很可惜有一两位无法参与这次的了旅程，还蛮希望下趟旅程大家都能参与。

总结这趟旅程：我要下趟旅程！
*
这几天都特别想念他。
可能是看到姐妹们和男友在一起，心里还是难免会有点小小嫉妒。
甚至好希望你就能立刻在我身边。

但听到姐妹们的感情故事，又很庆幸这段距离能让我们彼此成长成熟。
因为距离，我们学会了坚强和信任。
也学会了收敛自己的感情。
真的。
我真的觉得自己很庆幸和幸运。
我们就是能这么地相处。

亲爱的，我好想念你。。。

2010年11月4日星期四

Decision...

I'll be away for a day (I hope).
Going Port Dickson with the girls.

Ya.
Another trip with them.
Since last trip to Sekichan, we've been trying to plan to go another place.
And supposedly we want to go on December as everyone's studies will be much more relax.
But then, out of nowhere, Chen said Port Dickson is offering good price and we should check it out.
So, things went on a bit indecisive.

Everyone were like a little shock or feel a little hurried. (That's what i felt.)
So, it was kinda hard to gather everyone.
And so, we didnt really dig in where to stay or play or eat or...
Haha~

Till, someone broke the silence and said let's treat it as an adventure.
We'll go with luck to see if we can accommodation. Or not it'll be a one day trip.
We'll travel around to see where fun will be.
We stop whenever we see a restaurant.
So, ya, everyone agreed, and we are now preparing for Port Dickson.

I know it's a risky and dangerous.
Still, we are young.
And we have the balls to take the risk and adventure.
I do hope everything will work out well.
And a bunch of good memories will be made.
=)

*
Maybe i really need to shut myself.
I mean i need a space to think about it.
But it aint easy at all.
As if i had to choose a side.

Yes, gaining experience is a good thing.
But gaining it without having a plan or backup support will make you fall.
Some more, this is a money world.
A word where you need money to survive instead of compensating us with parties etc.
Yes, a party sounds nice.
Yes, we will feel much appreciate with that way.

But think wisely, we need physical things to fill our wallet.
Not a few hours of fun and free stuff.
It cant support me, if i'm traveling in a long distance.
I cant.

But then, i love it so much.
I love how i will gain the experience.
I love how it make me stronger.
I love how it teach me fight back, but leave some space for the others.
I love how a team will work so hard to nail someone.
I love everything that i'm investing in.

It's a place that will make me fall and stand up again.
So in the future, i know how the pain will look like.
How much i can suffer to get things done.
I just know it.

My question had voice out.
Now, it's all left me to decide...
*
It's been awhile since we web cam.
Hehe~
But thank Buddha that Facebook saved me from it.

I almost forgot that he'll be facing exam now.
And that's most probably the reason.
Ya, it's a good thing.
To keep him more concentrate and keep in mind that he's still a student.
So, you hear me, focus!

But, man, i miss you so much...

2010年11月2日星期二

好胆你就来张惠妹

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

拢系力啦拢系力啦拢系力害我面仔红红
你ㄟ心我ㄟ心结结做一毁是要打算安怎
拢系力啦拢系力啦拢系力害我归刚茫茫
你ㄟ心我ㄟ心现在卖哥gay
要讨我的爱 好胆你丢来
卖放在心内万炭谋狼灾
思念作风台心情三温暖
其实我都知 好胆你丢来
拢系力啦拢系力啦拢系力害我气心鲁命
你ㄟ心我ㄟ心结结做一毁是要打算安怎
拢系力啦拢系力啦拢系力害我归刚勒火大
你ㄟ心我ㄟ心现在卖哥gay
要讨我的爱 好胆你丢来
卖放在心内万炭谋狼灾
思念作风台心情三温暖
其实我都知 好胆你丢来
要讨我的爱 好胆你就来
别放在心里埋怨无人知
思念做台风心情三温暖
其实我都知
好胆你就来
*
最近也比较放松了。
不知是否因为事情快要结尾了，心情也没那么紧张了。

但，这还是没有阻止到我的问题蔓延。
我还是会开口的。
还是会解决的。
这是我的问题，怎样都好，我都会要解决。

时间越久，那问题就会缠着我。
也许很多事情都不能如愿完成了。
而且，我还只是个学生，一个还没真正有能力赚钱的学生。
靠得都是平时省吃俭用来度过的。
而且我还有学业要兼顾。
要读好书，不让任何失望。

是的，怎样都好，我还是会提出我的问题。
*
说好等到事情解决再找他。
但，还是把自己的决定告诉了他。
他也同意。

不知为何，心里就莫名地勇敢起来。
仿佛就得到了一个认可，一份信心。
还真的要谢谢他，我才会这么坚持。

最近应该都让他担心了吧~
心里的苦衷和压力都一直不断不断地告诉他。
导致那段时间，听到的都是我的压力在牢骚。
而他说了什么，我都没什么听到。
真的好失败。。。

但，现在已经下定决心了。
心里也比较冷静了。
开始听到了周遭的声音。

亲爱的，我真的很想你。。。