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Bituwin -
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Dementee -
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Words from Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls.
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2011年7月29日星期五
One more paper!
Alright, lets see what have i done for the past whole week.
I mean all the answers are out there if you really pay attention in class and on Ms Yen's notes.
Its been a while i was having fun writing.
Until my sore and i just realized how many pages i had done.
So, right now, pray for me.
=)
You guys were just damn awesome!
I dont know what to say and i feel so proud to be part of it.
Every single group had their own little creativity and you guys can transformed it with actors, camera angles, lightning, location, props, shots.
Everything that you can mention.
WE ROCK!!!
That was fast and i kinda like it.
(Except this India guys, who smokes like theres no tomorrow, is sitting beside me. Gross and superb gross!)
I did it at Jalan Sultan.
Located behind of Amcorp Mall.
Maybe i can consider going there 3 years later.
=)
So that's all for this week.
I was having fun more than suffering from exam pressure.
I mean i can even watch Korean drama, a few movies, brought the monsters out for dinner, and even online for the whole day.
Or maybe i just know how to find a way out?
Well, either way, gotta start prepare for the final paper for this semester -- MORAL!!! >.<
*
I dont know how well i am doing right now.
But i know i've been laughing and smiling a lot. Sincerely.
Yes, there were few nights, he came in my dreams, and i woke up with tears on my cheeks.
But i just moved on and continue my journey to my goal.
I might be weak at some times and some times i just simply acting strong.
It's a way for me to protect myself.
And a way for me to lay rest some memories.
Ethics in PR - Done!
It was quite easy in a way.I mean all the answers are out there if you really pay attention in class and on Ms Yen's notes.
Its been a while i was having fun writing.
Until my sore and i just realized how many pages i had done.
So, right now, pray for me.
=)
Field Production Techniques - Done!
Good job to everyone.You guys were just damn awesome!
I dont know what to say and i feel so proud to be part of it.
Every single group had their own little creativity and you guys can transformed it with actors, camera angles, lightning, location, props, shots.
Everything that you can mention.
WE ROCK!!!
P License to L License - Done!
Didnt know it took me less than 10mintues to get it done.That was fast and i kinda like it.
(Except this India guys, who smokes like theres no tomorrow, is sitting beside me. Gross and superb gross!)
I did it at Jalan Sultan.
Located behind of Amcorp Mall.
Maybe i can consider going there 3 years later.
=)
So that's all for this week.
I was having fun more than suffering from exam pressure.
I mean i can even watch Korean drama, a few movies, brought the monsters out for dinner, and even online for the whole day.
Or maybe i just know how to find a way out?
Well, either way, gotta start prepare for the final paper for this semester -- MORAL!!! >.<
*
I dont know how well i am doing right now.
But i know i've been laughing and smiling a lot. Sincerely.
Yes, there were few nights, he came in my dreams, and i woke up with tears on my cheeks.
But i just moved on and continue my journey to my goal.
I might be weak at some times and some times i just simply acting strong.
It's a way for me to protect myself.
And a way for me to lay rest some memories.
Just pray Buddha, i really need strength and courage at some point.
But at the end of day, you and i know, i will be stronger than anyone else.
All i had to do right now, is just smile and wave to my past.
I'm moving on and i can feel i'm getting nearer to my goal.
But at the end of day, you and i know, i will be stronger than anyone else.
All i had to do right now, is just smile and wave to my past.
I'm moving on and i can feel i'm getting nearer to my goal.
Wish Me Luck =)
2011年7月25日星期一
考试加油！
今天星期一。
第一张试卷在星期四。
等等！
星期四？！
这个星期四？！
然后今天是星期一？！
哦不~~~
我还没开始温习呢~
怎么会这样啊~~~
天啊~~~
我还很闲情地追了两天的韩剧和电影。
现在回头想想。
我之前有说过要开始温习的。
在Twitter和微博不停地提醒自己。
最后只要一想到剧情的发展，就开始投入在剧情里面了。
哈哈~
还说什么要开始温习呢~
不过今天真的要开始了。
不然我就可以早点见到佛陀了。
那就祝我考试愉快，也要加油了！
拼啦~~~
=)
第一张试卷在星期四。
等等！
星期四？！
这个星期四？！
然后今天是星期一？！
哦不~~~
我还没开始温习呢~
怎么会这样啊~~~
天啊~~~
我还很闲情地追了两天的韩剧和电影。
现在回头想想。
我之前有说过要开始温习的。
在Twitter和微博不停地提醒自己。
最后只要一想到剧情的发展，就开始投入在剧情里面了。
哈哈~
还说什么要开始温习呢~
不过今天真的要开始了。
不然我就可以早点见到佛陀了。
虽然我的父母没什么理会我的成绩或表现。
可是，难得我可以读到我有感兴趣的科目，而且过去的几年在中学表现也让人开始感到有点无奈了。
那就不要让这无奈感持续，我当然要拼了。
可是，难得我可以读到我有感兴趣的科目，而且过去的几年在中学表现也让人开始感到有点无奈了。
那就不要让这无奈感持续，我当然要拼了。
至少让我安心地考完，然后就可以安排我的行程在台湾了。
是吧？
我的安排也不错吧？
哈哈~
是吧？
我的安排也不错吧？
哈哈~
那就祝我考试愉快，也要加油了！
拼啦~~~
=)
2011年7月23日星期六
I'm sorry...
First of all, i'd like to apologize to my video production team mates.
I've been neglecting my responsibility as a student and team player.
And i went out and have fun, with you guys working so hard to make things done.
I'm truly truly very sorry.
Today at 12.30pm, i'm back as student and team player.
I'll bring my financial problems to the back of my head, and keep myself busy with the final stage.
I know i'm suck.
And yes, i deserve to be scold and curse at the same time.
I mean i've know it for a long time.
If i cant cope everything at the same time, i should start thinking of quitting my job.
But i left it, and thought i really can handle everything at once.
I know i suck a lot time.
And i just deserve it...
I've been neglecting my responsibility as a student and team player.
And i went out and have fun, with you guys working so hard to make things done.
I'm truly truly very sorry.
Today at 12.30pm, i'm back as student and team player.
I'll bring my financial problems to the back of my head, and keep myself busy with the final stage.
I know i'm suck.
And yes, i deserve to be scold and curse at the same time.
I mean i've know it for a long time.
If i cant cope everything at the same time, i should start thinking of quitting my job.
But i left it, and thought i really can handle everything at once.
But it turn out the wrong way.
I left my team mates working so hard.
They dont have enough sleep, they have to think of a way to solve all the obstacles.
While, me, I, just keep thinking of earning money and having fun at the same time.
I totally forgot my responsibility.
I left my team mates working so hard.
They dont have enough sleep, they have to think of a way to solve all the obstacles.
While, me, I, just keep thinking of earning money and having fun at the same time.
I totally forgot my responsibility.
I know i suck a lot time.
And i just deserve it...
2011年7月21日星期四
起起落落
人生果然是要起起落落的。
当时还是无知的我，就一直这么认为，我的人生就会这样度过的。
谁知，短短一个月内，发生了这么多事情。
我都一直在埋怨事情发生在错的时间点上。
我不知道这是不是天意。
或是佛陀认为我过得太开心了，所以要弄点东西，来让我觉得人生就是要这样的啊~
可是，习惯装坚强的我，总是在人们面前微笑。
殊不知，我心里流了多少泪水，叹了多少气。
我找不到任何人来述说，只好每天对着镜子练习微笑。
告诉自己，这一切只是过渡期，我只需要勇气和智慧，然后再一点好运。
谁知未来某日，我反而还得感谢这一切呢~
曾经想过要封闭我自己。
不要与外来接触。
只是多在角落头，细数时间的流逝。
可是我想到还有我家人和朋友们，我不忍心回到那角落头。
我必须要站出来，不可以让任何担心，也不能让任何看到我脆弱的一面。
我不知道是什么原因造就我这样的性格。
可是我就是知道，这就是我一直以来生存的方式。
我不敢保证， 也不能担保这些事情何时才能顺利完成。
我也不能说我会一直这样下去。
不过我就是不会服输的。
我只需牺牲一些事情，努力赚钱，努力读书，不要让家人和朋友觉得我是累赘。
佛陀，您就给弟子一点时间吧~
我会努力的，也会继续加油的。
我也不能说我会一直这样下去。
不过我就是不会服输的。
我只需牺牲一些事情，努力赚钱，努力读书，不要让家人和朋友觉得我是累赘。
佛陀，您就给弟子一点时间吧~
我会努力的，也会继续加油的。
2011年7月18日星期一
Rolling In The Deep by Adele
There’s a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch, it’s bringing me out the dark
Finally I can see you crystal clear
Go head and sell me out and I’ll lay your shit bare
See how I leave with every piece of you
Don’t underestimate the things that I will do
There’s a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch, and it’s bring me out the dark
The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
The scars of your love they leave me breathless
I can’t help feeling
We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
You had my heart and soul
And you played it
To the beat
Baby I have no story to be told
But I’ve heard one of you, and I’m gonna make your head burn
Think of me in the depths of your despair
Making a home down there, reminds you of the home we shared
The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
The scars of your love they leave me breathless
I can’t help feeling
We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
You had my heart and soul
And you played it
To the beat
We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
You had my heart and soul
But you played it
With the beat
Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turned my sorrow into treasured gold
You pay me back in kind and reap just what you sow
We could have had it all
We could have had it all
It all, it all it all,
We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
You had my heart and soul
And you played it
To the beat
We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
You had my heart and soul
But you played it,played it, played it
To the beat
*
Things are getting more heat up.
Everything clashed at the same time.
July aint being my friend since the beginning.
Everything got so wrong that i almost thought this will be my future life.
Yes, i lose and gain a lot.
But the pain and pressure seems to hate me more than ever.
They keep coming back whenever i let my guard down.
They keep attacking me whenever i try to relax and take a deep breath.
So much things and i still havent find a time to settle down.
I just keep myself busy and busy and busy.
I just wish i can reach one point and just break down.
So that i can have a chance to release my inner self first.
Then only i will pick up the pieces and move on.
I cant say if i am pretending to be strong or not.
But all i know, i choose to lock all those memories and keep it away.
Then i can focus on whatever i'm doing right now.
Still, problems keep finding me and they are haunting like hell.
I wont show my sadness and tears.
Instead the more stronger i want to be.
I wish i had a power to turn myself to steel whenever i want.
I just be unbeatable when someone is trying to trouble me at the wrong timing.
Instead the more stronger i want to be.
I wish i had a power to turn myself to steel whenever i want.
I just be unbeatable when someone is trying to trouble me at the wrong timing.
No, i'm not blaming anyone.
And i do not wish to gain any pity.
But i know i dont want to let the pain and pressure to grow in me.
I want to breath and i want to let myself free from all these.
You might change your perspective when the next time you see me.
Because i will be much more stronger and more independent than ever.
And i do not wish to gain any pity.
But i know i dont want to let the pain and pressure to grow in me.
I want to breath and i want to let myself free from all these.
You might change your perspective when the next time you see me.
Because i will be much more stronger and more independent than ever.
Just, for this meanwhile, just let me focus on whatever i'm holding.
Dont even try to ask me let go.
2011年7月13日星期三
破产 =(
我的天啊~
还没到月底，我就已经宣告破产了！
真是的！
明明上个月是赚最多的。
现在，月中都还没过，就已经。。。
T.T
唉~
大忙人就是这样的。
无意间就花了钱。
花了多少，花在哪里，花到有用处吗，都不知道。
唉~
看看我接下来的形成吧~
还有还有，考试之前我还是有做工的。
所以说咯~
那个钱到底花在哪里了，我自己都不知道。
可是就是很怕靠近银行了。
打开钱包，看到那些卡，心中还是有点小震。
哈哈~
但是，很开心啦~
这么多节目，我也可以暂时把以往不开心的事情，都全留给时间来解决。
我还是会像以往那样继续疯癫的。
只是，可能这次，在心中还是觉得有点悔恨。
不过，既然事情已经发生了，也发现了问题的所在，这样的结局也许对双方都是好事。
*
突然发现，那件事以后，我的心里有了小小的阴影。
现在只要看到/听到一对情侣/夫妻，意见不合，或甚至有一方告诉我，他需要让另一方冷静下来。
我的脑海就会开始浮现我的样子。
我的心会开始由担心转移到害怕。
我会担心他们的关系。
然后会害怕他们最后会跟我一样。
一样的结局，也许也是一样的理由。
然后我就开始幻想自己以后的样子。
是否也是每次只要意见不合，或者一方不断地迁就，我们就会开始分裂了。
我当然会怕啊~
或许我还真的需要时间来治疗自己。
告诉自己，其实这只是过渡期，因为我还是不能轻易放下两年的感情。
未来，一定有某人能帮我忘掉这一切，好好弥补我的阴影。
这样的人，也许还真的要等一段时间。
还没到月底，我就已经宣告破产了！
真是的！
明明上个月是赚最多的。
现在，月中都还没过，就已经。。。
T.T
唉~
大忙人就是这样的。
无意间就花了钱。
花了多少，花在哪里，花到有用处吗，都不知道。
唉~
看看我接下来的形成吧~
- 15/7 - 到Cheras继续拍短片
- 16/7 - Bon Odori!!!
- 17/7 - 到Cheras完成短片
- 18/7 - 一班朋友到酒吧（这个还没确定的）
- 25/7~1/8 - 考试周
还有还有，考试之前我还是有做工的。
所以说咯~
那个钱到底花在哪里了，我自己都不知道。
可是就是很怕靠近银行了。
打开钱包，看到那些卡，心中还是有点小震。
哈哈~
但是，很开心啦~
这么多节目，我也可以暂时把以往不开心的事情，都全留给时间来解决。
我还是会像以往那样继续疯癫的。
只是，可能这次，在心中还是觉得有点悔恨。
不过，既然事情已经发生了，也发现了问题的所在，这样的结局也许对双方都是好事。
*
突然发现，那件事以后，我的心里有了小小的阴影。
现在只要看到/听到一对情侣/夫妻，意见不合，或甚至有一方告诉我，他需要让另一方冷静下来。
我的脑海就会开始浮现我的样子。
我的心会开始由担心转移到害怕。
我会担心他们的关系。
然后会害怕他们最后会跟我一样。
一样的结局，也许也是一样的理由。
然后我就开始幻想自己以后的样子。
是否也是每次只要意见不合，或者一方不断地迁就，我们就会开始分裂了。
我当然会怕啊~
或许我还真的需要时间来治疗自己。
告诉自己，其实这只是过渡期，因为我还是不能轻易放下两年的感情。
未来，一定有某人能帮我忘掉这一切，好好弥补我的阴影。
这样的人，也许还真的要等一段时间。
现在的我，就要学会珍惜身边的人。
感谢他们的爱和支持，我才能坚强起来。
也因为他们，我才知道，有些人遇到了，能在一起，就该感到欣慰了。
=)
感谢他们的爱和支持，我才能坚强起来。
也因为他们，我才知道，有些人遇到了，能在一起，就该感到欣慰了。
=)
2011年7月11日星期一
5/7/2011 12am
One phone call, 30 minutes talk.
I'm back being single again.
2 years of relationship, and because of some reason, we decided to break up.
It's very heartache, and i thought i almost died.
Everything was very sudden.
Just like how he did to me before.
Maybe i experienced it before, this time i recover in the fastest time.
I thought i can cry, but after that few tears over the phone, i cant cry at all.
But my chest suffered a lot.
I felt suffocated a lot of times, and i dont feel like eating at all.
Still, most of the time, i force myself to smile and eat, so that people wont worried about me.
Yes, i did it in the end.
I smiled and laughed much more.
After cooling down, thinking all the way back, i'm cool now.
Many loved ones gave me a lot of words of wisdom.
And i've been a lot of thinking.
I just learn one thing, there's no one to blame between us.
Both of us change and grown up.
No longer we are on the same path, though we tried to.
And now, we found out, i guess its better to let go than hurting both side.
Well, still, i'm glad that we been together for 2 years.
Of course, there's a lot of appreciation in it.
I just hope there'll be no other girls to hear those words.
Or even to cry for those words.
Those words are from someone irresponsible and coward.
Yet, its our choice and we had to live with it.
In a nutshell, i'm gonna stay strong and be more focus in my life.
I'll live and love much more stronger than now and before.
Wish me luck =)
I'm back being single again.
2 years of relationship, and because of some reason, we decided to break up.
It's very heartache, and i thought i almost died.
Everything was very sudden.
Just like how he did to me before.
Maybe i experienced it before, this time i recover in the fastest time.
I thought i can cry, but after that few tears over the phone, i cant cry at all.
But my chest suffered a lot.
I felt suffocated a lot of times, and i dont feel like eating at all.
Still, most of the time, i force myself to smile and eat, so that people wont worried about me.
Yes, i did it in the end.
I smiled and laughed much more.
After cooling down, thinking all the way back, i'm cool now.
Many loved ones gave me a lot of words of wisdom.
And i've been a lot of thinking.
I just learn one thing, there's no one to blame between us.
Both of us change and grown up.
No longer we are on the same path, though we tried to.
And now, we found out, i guess its better to let go than hurting both side.
Yes, i did cursed and mad about him.
But after this one whole week of cool down, and even getaway to Kuantan, i realized i should save those anger and transit to another things.
I should be more focus on my studies, on my family and friends, on my financial problems, on my own leisure and entertainment.
I might even found another better man than him. Haha~ xD
But after this one whole week of cool down, and even getaway to Kuantan, i realized i should save those anger and transit to another things.
I should be more focus on my studies, on my family and friends, on my financial problems, on my own leisure and entertainment.
I might even found another better man than him. Haha~ xD
Well, still, i'm glad that we been together for 2 years.
Of course, there's a lot of appreciation in it.
I just hope there'll be no other girls to hear those words.
Or even to cry for those words.
Those words are from someone irresponsible and coward.
Yet, its our choice and we had to live with it.
In a nutshell, i'm gonna stay strong and be more focus in my life.
I'll live and love much more stronger than now and before.
Wish me luck =)
2011年7月2日星期六
7月
七月了。
好快哦~
2011年，就这样，过了一大半。
如果2012年的预言真的准的话，那我们还有大概1年5个月的时间而已。
1年5个月，如果有小孩的话，小孩子刚刚学会说话，开始学会探索这个世界。
不过，算了啦，怎样都好，我们还是得每天都珍惜当下吧~
要好好说6月。
整体来说，我不是过的很好。
尤其最后那几天。
因为拉不下面子，频频与人有摩擦。
泪水和脾气，从来没有一天没有它们的陪伴。
后来，是在某个时间点，才发现自己有这样的缺点。
开始说服自己，要首先学会撕破自己的面子，然后不管好坏都要学会接受别人的批评。
因为到头来他们都是为了你好。
要你学会改变，要你看清楚你自己看不到的缺点。
6月，我也学会道歉了。
道歉当然是每个人都会。
可是这次不一样。
我学会道歉的真真的意义了。
道歉后，本应就是该忘掉且原谅每个人。
而不是只是随便一句对不起就能挽救整个局面了。
那么，如果是那样，警察局和法律要来干嘛？
不过，这整个过程还需要更细心地调整。
有时我还是会犯一样的错误。
但也请你一定不可以跟我人来疯。
你一定要跟我硬撞到底。
不可以转头就任由我的笨蛋脑袋控制我。
跟我对撞，然后大声地告诉我，我就是做错了。
有时我还是会犯一样的错误。
但也请你一定不可以跟我人来疯。
你一定要跟我硬撞到底。
不可以转头就任由我的笨蛋脑袋控制我。
跟我对撞，然后大声地告诉我，我就是做错了。
要说这些，还真的需要很大的勇气。
因为这就等于把我的弱点告诉了全世界。
届时也可能有人利用它来与我宣战。
不过，为了自己的好，也省得泪水带来的误解，我还是选择说了出来。
7月，请你一定要对我好点。
泪水和脾气就暂时收起来。
不要让它们害得我的人际关系变差，我们之间的信任开始消失，我们曾经的承诺开始成为谎言。
就把它们封锁起来。
就让我以正面力量来对抗我的生活中的大大小小。
我已经累了。
我不想再浪费力气了。
也不想要让更多的人对我产生误解。
泪水和脾气就暂时收起来。
不要让它们害得我的人际关系变差，我们之间的信任开始消失，我们曾经的承诺开始成为谎言。
就把它们封锁起来。
就让我以正面力量来对抗我的生活中的大大小小。
我已经累了。
我不想再浪费力气了。
也不想要让更多的人对我产生误解。
就对我好点。
我也可以喘口气，可以随心所欲地微笑和爱。