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Cry

This few days been busy with FPT's final video.
So far, i guess, everything is still keep on track.
Nothing goes wrong and i hope it will never.

Oh ya, our Writing for Different Media class had been replaced by Mr Cyrus, which he is a bit boring.
I wasnt really concentrating in his class.
I was either daydreaming or discussing the final video with Nikki and Crystal.
But it was a relief that the class doesnt require exam papers.
Or else, i'll cry till death.
Haha~

Well, still the same old routine, with a bit twist.
But it doesnt make any difference in my life.
And i still living it with pleasure.
I might complain about one thing or two, but i still want to live it to the fullest.
Whatever it is, luck and health, please be with us until this video ends.
=)
*
Chat and webcam with him recently.
Of course i'm thrilled with it.
I mean after that incident happened, he had to gone through finals and i was busying with all my assignments, and we dont really have the time to chat nicely.
But now, within one week, we can webcam twice, thats very sweet.

Yesterday, he pinpointed something.
Something that almost crushed myself.
I mean, i always tried to be the one he wants me to be, and i got lost.
So, i set up a journey, to find myself back.
Already at the start of the journey, i should be prepared for everything and anything.
But why when those words came out from his mouth, i can heard a crack in my heart?

Yes, he is right in a way.
I was always the passive one.
I never dare to take the next step, until he does so.
Little do i know, this had made him a burden, and he scared he will lose faith in me.
Thus, i kept silence and hold my tears.

I wanted to cry because i know who i was, but i was denying it all the time.
Until he pinpointed out and it was someone is exposing your weakness.
The other reason is, i get to know how worst i was.
I never thought of this.
Surely i know my problem, but i dont know how to solve it.

Then again, my cousin's word rang my mind.
Is it? I dont know.
Is it really that i always take the blame?
If it is, how badly have i gotten?
I feel like crying again...

21:05 ·