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Happy Wesak Day

First and foremost, Happy Wesak day to all of you out there.
May Buddha blessed you all.
We all live in a harmony and peaceful environment.
=)

Alright.
Yesterday night went to Chenz's house.
Went there for overnight girls' talk.
Brought brownies, snacks, poker cards, pillows, pajamas, bear bear...
And we are ready to rock the night.

Well, we talked a lots of stuff.
Mostly surrounding relationships.
Me and Stef used up the whole night, watching videos from Youtube.
Damn lots of epic things we had done.
Damn lots of epic topic we talked about.

Some were heartache, some were touching, some were just simply gossip.
All i can say is, we sistas are stronger than we look.
We might need a lot of strength to conquer all the hardness we are going through right now.
But at the end of the day, we need to show how unbeatable we are.
And even though we lost our loves one, that doesnt stop us from having fun in our life.

Boys and men, they are simply just a passerby.
They might leave a deep scar, or they might just take your breath away.
But do remember, my loves, no matter what happened, we will be there for each other.
We just love each other too much.
And we just dont want to see each other to get hurt.

Smile and remember to love yourself everyday.
=)
*
One more week and i'm off to one week mid term break.
This is so fast and i almost cant believe we are in the mid May now.
Times really sure fly.

This my 4th sem and everything seems in a nice and smooth way.
So far everything is looking good and nothing much need to be worried.

But 3 more sem and i need to consider my future.
This question had been bothering me on and off.
Still, i cant see the answer yet.
I always say let the fate decide.
But is there really nothing i can work on?
I mean at least i still have the balls to dream.

I wont like to list out what is my consideration for stop dreaming.
It just seems annoying at some point.
Yet it's so true and i'm living with it.

*
After that phone call, i gotta admit first, i was so brave that i didnt let my tears flow.
No, you silly, we are fine.
But sometimes you gotta find out what is causing this silence, and you have to make a move to solve it.

We chatted a lot that day.
After hanging up the phone, i realize he's right at some point.
Yet, i still cant change the fact that the silence had hurt our relationship.
I dont know it's in a good way or bad way, but i'm still hanging on. (And i hope he is.)

This is the third week since the silence starts.
And i shall thanks this silence.
I dont know whether it makes me grown up or not.
But it leads me to another world.

I found out that i can get my happy source from anywhere.
No longer it only limits to him.
I can be happy when i'm with my family, with my friends, when i'm driving, when i'm alone, when i'm riding in a train, when i'm rushing assignments...
I can be happy anytime and anywhere.
And i felt a relief that i no need to worried about his emotions if i do this do that.
I just be myself and i'm fine and i'm happy.

Still, no doubt, i miss him.
I miss talking crap with him.
I miss making him smile with my silly questions.
I miss all those sweets talk that happen for no reason.
I miss his words and his tone.
I miss the way he put me to bed.
I miss sharing all my joy to him.
I miss his warmth, even we are far apart.
I miss...
I just simply miss him.

12:07 ·